If baby milestone cards were made for mums…

Who’s seen baby milestone cards? They’re the cards that capture significant events in a baby’s first year – each weekly and monthly birthday, that all-important first smile or those initial wobbly Bambi-zombie steps, for example – that you use in a photo of your child taken when each  event happens.

As well as being cute Insta-fodder and a socially acceptable excuse for some stealth baby spamming, the card / picture combo is also perfect for exhausted parents for whom memory recall might just be a bit, well, cloudy later on (“When did you roll over? Of course I know! I do! Hmmm….oh wait, let me check my photos“).

But as developmentally speedy as this time is for babies, the post-birth first six months and year is also pretty busy for parents. It’s packed with significant and slightly smaller mum- memories and milestones, both brilliant and not-so-bad. So why don’t they make these cards for grown-ups, too? Come on marketeers! It’s an idea just crying out to happen.

So if baby milestone cards were made for the first year of motherhood, what would yours say? Here’s a couple of slightly alternative suggestions from me:

1. I pushed something the size of *that* out of *there* and was home in time for dinner
2. Today I sat down without wincing (hello, painkillers)
3. I spent X hours staring at my baby in awe and wonder and am not even sorry
4. Today my partner went back to work and I survived alone with two children and only made five frantic phone calls and 20 panic texts
5. Fitted into my pre-baby jeans
6. Fitted into my pre-baby jeans AND did the button up
7. Today I had two hours of broken sleep and was up at 5am…coffee?
8. Today I slept for five hours in one go and am winning at life
9. Totally did that thing again that that catapulted us into babydom in the first place
10. First night out post-baby!
11. First post-baby hangover…day 2
12. Today I mainly looked forward to my end-of-the-day wine
13. I kept a small person alive for X days / weeks / months using the power of my boobs, and cake
14. Today my child said what maybe, possibly, could have been ‘mama’, and I cried like a baby
15. Today I did…what again?

What would yours say? Answers on a (post) card please, or in a photo, posted on a social network…x

Make sure you also read my post on things’s they DON’T tell you in NCT classes, an ode to all the less-than-perfect mums and why my mobile makes me a better mum