Spy Kids: The Secrets of the School Day
How difficult is it to find out about your child’s day at school? No seriously, *how* difficult is it?
It’s a sharp contrast to the baby days at nursery where you get a written report telling you the minutest detail about everything, from how much they breathed to what they said and where they looked. Followed by an end-of-the-day in-depth chat with the key worker. Which, let’s face it, was mainly me offloading my various daily tales of new mum woe while they patted my arm politely.
But, school. I had forewarning; everyone told me it would be hard to get any info out of your child at the end of the school day, especially in the early days when it’s all so new, exciting and exhausting. With this in mind I read a thousand weighty opinion pieces on ‘alternative questions to ask your child after school.’ I planned to be calm, laid-back, and let her tell me at her own leisurely pace and…”Who did you play with? What did you do? What did your teacher say? HOW WAS YOUR DAY?” I quizzed her at a million miles an hour the minute she left the door on the first mornng. Somewhat predictably.
To be fair she did humour me to the extent that I thought we had it sussed. But now, a few weeks in, she’s slightly more quiet. There’s often a tantalising titbit from the day, nothing, or ‘Can I have some more toast?’ I piece the fragments together with messages from other mums and a much-checked PDF of the lunch menu.
I feel like I am interrogating her for classified info. Which she’s excellent at withholding. I know I’m supposed to think that she’s worn out and processing it all and it’s a sensory overload and she’s more tired than, well, me (see here). But she could actually be learning national secrets in there and I’d have no idea.
Oh wait, I’ve just remembered. She is actually brilliant at divulging information, when she wants. Here’s three examples:
- To Alex, two seconds after he walked in through the door: ‘Mummy was grumpy today and she dropped a plate on the floor.’ (True on both accounts, but…)
- To lots of random people at playgroup one day: ‘I stay up late on Friday and we get a Dominos’ (Gahh! Definitely classified info)
- And my all-time, personal favourite, to a random man in our local shop: ‘My mummy LOVES wine.’ (I mean, who doesn’t – but seriously?!)
Thinking about it, is she secretly working for the ‘other side’? Shall I ask her? Who knows. The probability of me finding out is about 0%.