Spy Kids: The Secrets of the School Day

September 29, 2016

How difficult is it to find out about your child’s day at school? No seriously, *how* difficult is it?

Spy kids and the secrets of the school day

It’s a sharp contrast to the baby days at nursery where you get a written report telling you the minutest detail about everything, from how much they breathed to what they said and where they looked. Followed by an end-of-the-day in-depth chat with the key worker. Which, let’s face it, was mainly me offloading my various daily tales of new mum woe while they patted my arm politely.

But, school. I had forewarning; everyone told me it would be hard to get any info out of your child at the end of the school day, especially in the early days when it’s all so new, exciting and exhausting. With this in mind I read a thousand weighty opinion pieces on ‘alternative questions to ask your child after school.’ I planned to be calm, laid-back, and let her tell me at her own leisurely pace and…”Who did you play with? What did you do? What did your teacher say? HOW WAS YOUR DAY?” I quizzed her at a million miles an hour the minute she left the door on the first mornng. Somewhat predictably.

To be fair she did humour me to the extent that I thought we had it sussed. But now, a few weeks in, she’s slightly more quiet. There’s often a tantalising titbit from the day, nothing, or ‘Can I have some more toast?’ I piece the fragments together with messages from other mums and a much-checked PDF of the lunch menu.

I feel like I am interrogating her for classified info. Which she’s excellent at withholding. I know I’m supposed to think that she’s worn out and processing it all and it’s a sensory overload and she’s more tired than, well, me (see here).  But she could actually be learning national secrets in there and I’d have no idea.

Oh wait, I’ve just remembered. She is actually brilliant at divulging information, when she wants. Here’s three examples:

  • To Alex, two seconds after he walked in through the door: ‘Mummy was grumpy today and she dropped a plate on the floor.’ (True on both accounts, but…)
  • To lots of random people at playgroup one day: ‘I stay up late on Friday and we get a Dominos’ (Gahh! Definitely classified info)
  • And my all-time, personal favourite, to a random man in our local shop: ‘My mummy LOVES wine.’ (I mean, who doesn’t – but seriously?!)

Thinking about it, is she secretly working for the ‘other side’? Shall I ask her? Who knows. The probability of me finding out is about 0%.

More posts…six things that surprised me about schoolif baby milestone cards made for mums, things you’ll know if your child is an early riser and irritating things that only happen during naptime.


  • Alison

    September 29, 2016 at 11:24 am

    Hahah this made me chuckle. G is sometimes really good at telling me information (which I dutifully pass on to the other mums whose kids telling them NADA), but other times she is selective – like when I ask her what veg she ate with her lunch, we worked out she tells me what veg was put on her plate, but fails to tell me that she didn’t actually eat it.

  • Alice

    September 29, 2016 at 9:26 pm

    Haha, this is all so true!! Elfie’s quite good now at telling me info but Hux is RUBBISH. He can never even remember what he had for lunch (luckily I can tell as it’s all over his tshirt 😉

  • Slummy single mummy

    September 30, 2016 at 9:28 am

    Well, I reckon in all my years of parenting, I’ve learnt pretty much NOTHING about what actually goes on at school. It doesn’t get any easier!

  • Rachel

    September 30, 2016 at 11:51 am

    Information from Pip about school has not really been forthcoming either and when it does come if is often so out of context it really means nothing.

    She did tell me that the seats in the dining room are fixed to the table though!

  • Cait

    October 2, 2016 at 11:00 pm

    3 weeks in and I have absolutely no idea what he’s been up to at school. Judging by all the other Mums they are much the same. I try and catch him out by pre reading the lunch menu & guessing what he ate but he just ignore me. Gah!

  • Laura

    October 7, 2016 at 1:05 pm

    Haha I know exactly what you mean – every time I ask Arthur how school was I just see tumbleweed roll by and silence. However he is happy to tell everyone about our private business

    Laura x

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