Are we too negative about motherhood? Everything I seem to read now is about how boring it is, or how much you have to give up and sacrifice, or how things become tricky and complicated when you have children.
Clearly, lots of people are missing a trick. Along with all the good stuff you get to do instead, there’s lots of the not-so-good things you never have to do again.
Here’s the things I don’t miss about life before children (let me know yours):
* Going to Glastonbury festival – Don’t get me wrong, I love Glastonbury. From my sofa, in my lovely house with a fully stocked wine and snack fridge and clean, plumbed-in bathroom. I’ve been twice to the festival proper – we even jumped the fence and everything – and although it was great* (* hellish, knee deep in liquid farm mud, non-stop rain, people getting trench foot) I’m glad every year now that children are a convenient and valid enough excuse for me to never, ever, ever have to go again. I’m more than happy to go to festivals, as long as it’s one of the super civilised ones where you can drink prosecco and sleep in an airstream while your children do arts and crafts in a fairy costume. In about five years time. Maybe.
* Being really self concious – I went to a wedding the other day and realised halfway through ‘all things bright and beautiful’ that it was me I could hear singing really loudly. Three years of baby groups and nursery rhymes will do that to you; there’s no more mouthing along and low mumbling. I sing all the time in public now – walking down the street, on trains and busses, occasionally when neither of my children are there. Breastfeeding boobs and bikinis mean I’ve spent lots of my holiday with a slight bit of nipple showing, but aren’t bothered in the slightest. After having children I now have no shame, and it’s brilliantly liberating
* Working in an office – freelance life for me means working mainly from home. While there are loads of things I do miss about the full-time 9-5 (colleagues, banter, office-in jokes, lunchtime Topshop sprees, Friday beers) there’s an awful lot I don’t. This includes making up ridiculous, transport-based excuses for being late and all day meetings about meetings. I especially don’t miss the sweaty summer commute. I’ll take my non-ergonomic kitchen table any day
* Having spent most of my twenties going out most nights, I now much prefer my quality one night out a quarter. But what I don’t miss most of all is the hangovers. Drinking when you have children is not a good mixer. Especially when you have a 5am baby alarm clock that bashes you in the face (here’s a guide to hangovers with children. Ouch)
* Sleep – ha. Just kidding. That, I will never stop missing…x.
More posts: we need to talk about the post-baby rage, all my pregnancy posts and baby milestone cards…for mums.
8 Comments
Jodie
June 29, 2015 at 7:57 am
I always love reading posts like these as I never had an adult life before children. My before children was my childhood.
Clare @ Maybush Studio
June 29, 2015 at 8:24 am
I entirely agree with you particularly regarding office work. In the final few months before maternity leave I shared an office with a grown man who couldn’t blow his own nose and sniffed his way through the whole day. Don’t miss that one bit! 😉
Farrah
June 30, 2015 at 12:24 am
It’s so nice to read good things! I think you’re right that it is more often than not people focus on the negatives more than anything else. I feel like, despite being 22, I’ve done most of the things I should have done by now, clubs and nights out were from thirteen onwards, and all that gets very old very quickly. I’m looking forward to new things, to parenting, and things like this just make me a little less afraid of what’s coming. So, thank you!
Claire
June 30, 2015 at 11:16 pm
I’m so with you on the missing being self conscious! There are some nights when I feel relief at being able to use the kids as an excuse to not go out too!
Kathryn (@KatGotTheCream)
July 1, 2015 at 10:55 am
You’re so right about Glasto! I love watching it from the comfort of my sofa and while I have occasional moments of FOMO/nostagia, I’m not sure I can hack festivals like that any more.
Also don’t miss office politics and bitchiness. LOVE working from home 🙂 xx
Jess @ Along Came Cherry
July 1, 2015 at 2:59 pm
Haha I definitely don’t miss working in an office! I do miss Glastonbury though! We have said we are definitely going again next year but I’m sure I will probably struggle with camping and want to come home! x
fritha
July 3, 2015 at 5:58 pm
I love the having no shame thing too! I used to be so self conscious and remember my mum saying ‘once you had kids you really won’t care about all these things Fritha’ and I thought it meant because you’d given up or something but it’s because you just realise some things are so unimportant to worry about, it’s liberating like you said! x
Things I Find Easier As a Mum of Two
July 7, 2015 at 11:16 am
[…] P.S. If you liked this post then you should check out this one from Gill at A Baby On Board – Things I don’t miss about life before children. […]